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Alicja Efejska

Alicja Efejska Lektor, PEN

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Now, let's talk about the same thing from another angle. What do the Polish people think about the British?

I can say that:
1. they are very intelligent and quite assertive
2. they are very well-mannered and polite
3. they are very friendly
4. unfortunately they are often reserved and it ususally takes a lot of time to have a close relationship with them

What do you think?
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

I can't agree with your statement that British people are 'assertive'.

Conventions of politeness lead speakers of British English to frame requests and demands in a very tentative and roundabout fashion. This will result in an order being interpreted as a mere suggestion.

Also the British (famously) don't like complaining about service in restaurants.

The relationship between employer and employee is far less heirarchical in the British workplace. A Polish 'boss' would come across as an aggressive bully to many Brits.
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Alicja Efejska:
Now, let's talk about the same thing from another angle. What do the Polish people think about the British?

I can say that:
1. they are very intelligent and quite assertive
2. they are very well-mannered and polite
3. they are very friendly
4. unfortunately they are often reserved and it ususally takes a lot of time to have a close relationship with them

What do you think?

I presume you are refering to the stereotype here rather than your own personal experience.
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

I don't know too many Brits personally and only a few of them I know well, but their main common characteristics is they all have a pretty sarcastic sense of humo(u)r.

I can't say the British are more intelligent than any other nation - let's not mistake a level of education, or professional expertise for intelligence.

I do agree on the well-mannered bit.

Since most of my contacts with the British are business related I have never actually needed to break the ice in any particular way, but that of course is not what you are referring to in point 4. I have a surprisingly good "feeling" with a couple of Irish guys I work with.

I'd add: "nationalist" to the list.
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Definitely very funny in a nice shade of dark. Sarcastic in a good way (although this is somewhat of a feature that New Yorkers and Brits have in common I noticed).

I haven't had a chance to meet more than a handfull of Brits in my life time, but it's been a great experience each time.

I really like listening to English slang. Also, listening to someone curse in British English is also pretty entertaining.
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Agnieszka P.

Agnieszka P. Magister do kwadratu

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

I don't know whether it's about not being assertive or about being too polite but once, when I was visiting a room I was going to live in, I said "it's cold in here" (which was actually true) and afterwards I was told that it was rude of me!! no idea why such a comment would be rude... I said it in the same way I would do here, in Poland or anywhere else. and actually if the room I'm going to live in is not heated, I can't see why I wouldn't make a remark...
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Agnieszka Piechna:
I don't know whether it's about not being assertive or about being too polite but once, when I was visiting a room I was going to live in, I said "it's cold in here" (which was actually true) and afterwards I was told that it was rude of me!! no idea why such a comment would be rude... I said it in the same way I would do here, in Poland or anywhere else. and actually if the room I'm going to live in is not heated, I can't see why I wouldn't make a remark...

It's not just what you say, but how you say it.

Direct critical remarks are generally avoided by British people.

You have to find a way to 'soften' what you say, and put it in an indirect, tentative fashion.
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Alicja Efejska:
4. unfortunately they are often reserved and it ususally takes a lot of time to have a close relationship with them

I'd mark that with a tiny asterisk and put an explanation below: "Not applicable to Scots, aye?" :)))
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Alicja Efejska

Alicja Efejska Lektor, PEN

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

warren whitmore:
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

I can't agree with your statement that British people are 'assertive'.

I've worked with the British here for many years now and they always argue about things with our bosses here. and whether they are right or not, our bosses always concede, the Brits do it in such an assertive / demanding manner.
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Alicja Efejska

Alicja Efejska Lektor, PEN

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

warren whitmore:
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

If you have a lot of things to say, it would be great if you shared your knowledge and experience with us. :)
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Alicja Efejska:
warren whitmore:
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

I can't agree with your statement that British people are 'assertive'.

I've worked with the British here for many years now and they always argue about things with our bosses here. and whether they are right or not, our bosses always concede, the Brits do it in such an assertive / demanding manner.

Perhaps it is a novel experience for them to be challenged by an 'underling'.warren whitmore edytował(a) ten post dnia 13.02.08 o godzinie 22:57
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

warren whitmore:
Agnieszka Piechna:
I don't know whether it's about not being assertive or about being too polite but once, when I was visiting a room I was going to live in, I said "it's cold in here" (which was actually true) and afterwards I was told that it was rude of me!! no idea why such a comment would be rude... I said it in the same way I would do here, in Poland or anywhere else. and actually if the room I'm going to live in is not heated, I can't see why I wouldn't make a remark...

It's not just what you say, but how you say it.

Direct critical remarks are generally avoided by British people.

You have to find a way to 'soften' what you say, and put it in an indirect, tentative fashion.

Unfortunately, I can confirm it Warren! I am an open and straightforward person and was in A LOT of trouble because of it in one charity I used to work for.... :( The hard thing is that many people here take offence very quickly without asking the offender (a foreigner) what he/she meant..... Also they wouldn't even try to resolve the issue with the wrongdoer in question, but report it to their superiors (when we are talking of a workplace); in this way, really petty things/conflicts are blown out of proportion.... It can be very irritating.
Yet, when in Rome do as the Romans do, and so I have, sort of, withdrawn from being to open or straightforward with people who are not my friends here....
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Alicja Efejska:
warren whitmore:
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

If you have a lot of things to say, it would be great if you shared your knowledge and experience with us. :)

Yeah, but I wish to avoid 'slanging matches' if I can possibly help it.
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Agnieszka P.

Agnieszka P. Magister do kwadratu

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

warren whitmore:
Agnieszka Piechna:
I don't know whether it's about not being assertive or about being too polite but once, when I was visiting a room I was going to live in, I said "it's cold in here" (which was actually true) and afterwards I was told that it was rude of me!! no idea why such a comment would be rude... I said it in the same way I would do here, in Poland or anywhere else. and actually if the room I'm going to live in is not heated, I can't see why I wouldn't make a remark...

It's not just what you say, but how you say it.

Direct critical remarks are generally avoided by British people.

You have to find a way to 'soften' what you say, and put it in an indirect, tentative fashion.

sure, Warren, you're right. but I wrote: I said it in the same way I would do here, in Poland or anywhere else. this means I said it in a "normal" way and didn't mean to offend anybody or to be rude. and I really can't see why it would be considered as rude. and, actually, why shouldn't I say that it is cold in the room if it is cold? gee, that's just a statement. I think it's normal that when you are visiting the room you're going to live in, you point out things that are not as you think they should be. it's before you move in that you should say it, not afterwards. and why do people avoid to be direct? direct doesn't necesserily means offending...
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Steve Jones

Steve Jones Business English
Trainer, Translator,
Proofreader

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

It's not just what you say, but how you say it.

Direct critical remarks are generally avoided by British people.

You have to find a way to 'soften' what you say, and put it in an indirect, tentative fashion.

sure, Warren, you're right. but I wrote: I said it in the same way I would do here, in Poland or anywhere else. this means I said it in a "normal" way and didn't mean to offend anybody or to be
rude.

I think the point is that a "normal" way in Poland isn't the same as the "normal" way in Britain. Different cultures have different norms, do they not?

The thing to do is learn from it. You can't just some out and say sth like "it's cold in here" in Britain without prefacing it somehow or turning it into sth humorous or sth like that. It's just the way it is. You won't change it. Live with it!
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

warren whitmore:

Direct critical remarks are generally avoided by British people.

You have to find a way to 'soften' what you say, and put it in an indirect, tentative fashion.

This is very interesting. California has a very simmilar mind set. People would rather talk around the actual subject and get to it eventualy, than get right to it. I wonder what would a UK native feel like in NYC where everything is pretty much served up cold and right in your face? I am a pretty opinionated fellow myself (hehe no shit!). I really don't like to get into those pseudo conversations, where things that apply to the subject at hand, are the lead ups to the actual point of a story. It is something that is done in some circles of people during more personal conversations in a group of friends etc etc... but it is definitely not your average custom. You live and you learn.

How about you Warren, personally. Would you rather have someone be square with you, shoot straight and let you know exactly how or what they feel about an action, statement or whatever else it may be, or would you prefer it to be served with an apetizer? I always thought it was a matter of a personal preferance, never knew that it had a deeper cultural root. Cool...Rafal Wolk edytował(a) ten post dnia 14.02.08 o godzinie 03:53
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Alicja Efejska

Alicja Efejska Lektor, PEN

Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

warren whitmore:
Alicja Efejska:
warren whitmore:
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

If you have a lot of things to say, it would be great if you shared your knowledge and experience with us. :)

Yeah, but I wish to avoid 'slanging matches' if I can possibly help it.

I think we 've already learnt that we should avoid them and our differences do make us richer. :)))) Go ahead, Warren, share it with us. :)
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Rafal Wolk:
How about you Warren, personally. Would you rather have someone be square with you, shoot straight and let you know exactly how or what they feel about an action, statement or whatever else it may be, or would you prefer it to be served with an apetizer? I always thought it was a matter of a personal preferance, never knew that it had a deeper cultural root. Cool...

I'd say you were a little naive, Rafal.

Usually it's, 'tell me (provided it's what I want to hear)'.

Most people don't want to hearn they are fat, boring, smelly and so on, even if it happens to be the truth.

However, I'm quite happy for anyone to tell me I'm handsome, intelligent and witty.

I imagine most people are the same.

Regarding my attitudes towards politeness - these are not really a matter of personal choice.

I, like everyone else, am conditioned by the cultural environment in which I grew up.
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

Alicja Efejska:
warren whitmore:
Alicja Efejska:
warren whitmore:
There's a lot I could say on this subject, but I'm not sure if it would be altogether wise to do so.

If you have a lot of things to say, it would be great if you shared your knowledge and experience with us. :)

Yeah, but I wish to avoid 'slanging matches' if I can possibly help it.

I think we 've already learnt that we should avoid them and our differences do make us richer. :)))) Go ahead, Warren, share it with us. :)

I believe the Poles have an inferiority complex concerning people from 'the West', including the U.K..
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Temat: Polish attitudes to the British people

I believe the Poles have an inferiority complex concerning people from 'the West', including the U.K..

yes, that is true but in regards to the older generation of Poles:)
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