Temat: cos you had a bad day

Slavic people seem to have a trait of sadness within... At least I do...

I'd decribe it more as a look of misery on the outside rather than sadness on the inside... or just general pessimism

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Lidia K.:
I think the term depression is kind of fashionable and used carelessly.

There's a difference between "feeling down" (momentarily) and being depressed as in deeper and more long-term.

Clinical depression can be extremely debilitating.

It's a luxury to announce you're depressed and getting everyone around to cheer you up (like I do sometimes, though I'd avoid the word 'depression').

This is known as "secondary gain"; a positive side to having a given problem. If you're depressed, it can be a good excuse not to do anything while at the same time getting lots of sympathy and attention. Therefore, for some people the "secondary gain" might outshadow the possible gain from recovery.

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Tatiana S.:

Steve Jones:

Tatiana S.:

Steve Jones:
You go to work, do some mind-crushing job and live for the weekend. The weekend comes and goes and what's the point in it all?

Weekends are, I say, still the brightest moments of a week. Unless they get spoiled by black cats.

That is indeed the traditional way of looking at things. However, my personal approach is to try to think outside of the weekend box and have a bloody excellent Monday as well. Happy Mondays, as it were.

TBH, I no longer have "weekdays" and "weekends" as such. Unfortunately, other people around me still do.

I don't either, Tatiana. Let's wallow in our miseries together.

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Sylwia, have a look at this:

http://www.ojar.com/view_1489.htm

:))

Will this song help you?

http://video.aol.com/video-detail/wallowing-in-misery/...Michał B. edytował(a) ten post dnia 21.10.08 o godzinie 22:42

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Steve Jones:

Lidia K.:
I think the term depression is kind of fashionable and used carelessly.

There's a difference between "feeling down" (momentarily) and being depressed as in deeper and more long-term.

Clinical depression can be extremely debilitating.

It's a luxury to announce you're depressed and getting everyone around to cheer you up (like I do sometimes, though I'd avoid the word 'depression').

This is known as "secondary gain"; a positive side to having a given problem. If you're depressed, it can be a good excuse not to do anything while at the same time getting lots of sympathy and attention. Therefore, for some people the "secondary gain" might outshadow the possible gain from recovery.

True. Although, from my experience, if you at all 'like' the people being around you, giving you attention and sympathy, then it might be that you don't suffer from depression after all. Which is good news, because then it means you just have the 'blues' and also that you can benefit form having your friends around to drag you out of the hole. That is, if you don't cheat and choose to stay in your hole so as to keep receiving attention.

Clinical depression really is bad news, all the more because the sufferers tend to a) not signal their bad state to others or ask for help and b) reject the help that is available. And with certain people, a silly blues may turn into a big depression if not nipped in the bud.

So, I think that if people crave attention for a while, let them enjoy it. After all, I'd rather be an attention seeker, than depressed ;)

Temat: cos you had a bad day

We should have a support group here, for all the attention seekers. I might benefit from that as well.

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Steve Jones:
I think it might be summarised in this way:

People need focus and purpose in their life within the framework of a community. Ironically, war provides all of the above.

What undermines focus and purpose are, amonst others, mind-numbing jobs. There is a theory that boredom became a concept once people shifted from hunter gatherers to farmers. They shifed from the focus and purpose of gathering fruit for the day and hunting a wild boar and then having to make a fire etc... this shifted into the monotony of watching crops grow only to be wiped out by the forces of nature. I feel this lead to a sense of futility, a sense of futility which is now felt by almost everyone at some stage of their life.

Religion briefly replaces the sense of futility and transformed it into a noble cross for us all to bear. Now this is also eroding from us.

The fact of the matter is that life is pointless in most cases. You go to work, do some mind-crushing job and live for the weekend. The weekend comes and goes and what's the point in it all? An endless cycle sets in of meaningless work, meaningless TV shows, bladdered at the weekend and it all starts again, briefly interrupted by the onset of a family who will in turn join in the cycle.

I've just totally lost my train of thought and have no idea how to conclude what I was writing! :)

do you have psychological background?

this is really well put.Magdalena Natalia Wiśniowska edytował(a) ten post dnia 21.10.08 o godzinie 23:14

Temat: cos you had a bad day

do you have psychological background?

this is really well put.Magdalena Natalia Wiśniowska edytował(a) ten post dnia 21.10.08 o godzinie 23:14

Not officially... in the sense that I've never formally studied psychology. However, I've read lots of stuff and it's an area I'm interested in and an area which plays a large role in NLP which is an interest of mine.

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Michał B.:
Sylwia, have a look at this:

http://www.ojar.com/view_1489.htm

:))

Oh, that's one big misery.

Will this song help you?

http://video.aol.com/video-detail/wallowing-in-misery/...

Yeah! ;)) Thanks! I'll remember this next time I feel desperate ;)

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Steve Jones:

Slavic people seem to have a trait of sadness within... At least I do...

I'd decribe it more as a look of misery on the outside rather than sadness on the inside... or just general pessimism

So where's the difference?

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Lidia K.:

So where's the difference?

The refusal to admit that things are really not bad by openly seeking pity while in general not really feeling that blue to begin with yet constantly searching for the smallest of reasons to complain about pretty much anything. (???)

Well… that was a mouthful…. Haha..

Temat: cos you had a bad day

I also think that hopeless romanticism is often mistaken for sadness. As it was the case with Don Quixote.

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Rafal W.:
The refusal to admit that things are really not bad by openly seeking pity while in general not really feeling that blue to begin with yet constantly searching for the smallest of reasons to complain about pretty much anything. (???)

Is it your experience of most Slavic people you've met?

Temat: cos you had a bad day

Lidia K.:

Rafal W.:
The refusal to admit that things are really not bad by openly seeking pity while in general not really feeling that blue to begin with yet constantly searching for the smallest of reasons to complain about pretty much anything. (???)

Is it your experience of most Slavic people you've > met?

I'd say a large part of the Polish populous, also the ex-Russian states... but Czech and Slovaks are usually very happy and upbeat people. With us Poles, I've noticed a nice gap between the "old school" that never smiles and frowns upon pretty much anything that you wouldn't find in their household and the new kids on the block but even with the new generation, there is still a very heavy dose of cynicism and negative energy present.

… but, just like I’ve said, it’s baseless for the most part and I think a lot of it has to do with a lack of comparison.Rafal W. edytował(a) ten post dnia 23.10.08 o godzinie 13:32